Is it just me.....

Or are most people past forty just old and crabby and dying. Come on get a life! The leader, mind you, and members of the local lesbian social group, or whining that the music is too loud and they can't talk.

They don't like the straight people coming into the bars...looking for a "third" partner. Oh please! Don't flatter yourself. They're there to dance and have fun!

Personally, "I love the night life. I love to boogie!" I love it! Even my younger friends who are in relationships don't like to go.

It's an escape for me, to let my hair down and enjoy the music. I love Beyonce, Timberlake, the Black Eyed Peas. I love "Sexy Back" and "The lump" and "SOS" and "Stupid Girl".

Old is not an age! Old is a state of mind. In fact everything from health to love is a state of mind. We control our own destinies in time.

I won't let these people depress me. I can't help them. They are lost in their own self-created misery. It's awful. It's a moan and groan group as far as I'm concerned. What a pity.

I can't only stand to read the "home for aged" emails.

Life is a amazing.

The Republican party has hijacked morality. For the 2008 Republican party candidates we have a group of mature, white-hair men espousing Evangelical Christian religion, war on Iran (yes, Iran is next..keep the war machine profiteering alive..) anti-pro choice (if they have their way they will have the Supreme Court reverse Roe vs Wade).

These Republicans say nothing about getting better health care in this country. Nor do they address the illegal immigrant situation that is perpetuating in this country and it blatantly being over-looked by this administration.

All of the candidates ride the fence regarding any issues, not wanting to rub anyone group or idealism the wrong way.

The Republican party is the "money" party each paying their own way and we all know money talks and gets elected. They all say that they do not take contributions from lobbyist. So, do the lobbyist contribute money to the party just across the board? There are 33,000 lobbyist in Washington D. C. on any given day. They are there to speak and give to politicians that will support their causes. Money speaks.

Personally, I wonder just what gripe do Republicans have about women and their bodies. Why do they want to control women's choices concerning their own bodies and consciousness. Frankly, it's done of their business what a woman does with their bodies.

I am so afraid that if Roe vs Wade goes away, coat hangar and back alley abortions will kill so many women. Doctors will be arrested. And the back alley doctors - are they really doctors or fakes just taking a poor desperate woman's money. I'm poor, but I just may have to contribute to NARAL Pro-Choice America. Yes, it's all about control and the diversion from the real issues that these Republican candidates should be confronting. Just wait they'll get to the homosexuals next and use them as diversions like they did in the last couple of elections.

Evangelical Christan's will offer to "fix" homosexuality by teaching them they do not have to act out their sexuality. This is just wrong! So, wrong. I hope to god any gay or lesbian never listens to this crap. Be yourself! Just promise me whoever you are....just be yourself and love each other. Be who you are! The hell with religious teachings. It's just a money maker for them anyway. They make up their impossible rules to keep, so you break them, and then they have to fix you. It's all a scam..all religions are scams. Being spiritual, is all that you need to be...it's free. It's an innate consciousiness. We all know what it takes to be a good person and that is integrity, honesty, non-judgmental, non-racist, celebrating our differences, ethical, and loving thy neighbor . Yes, in other words just don't be a priest or an elected offical.

So, according to The Secret, like attracts like so send out love and get love in return.

It's gonna burn...

I'm getting rid of the clunker! It bite my butt today. Ouch!

It's time to update and unload the thing. But, anyway, I rode 65 miles yesterday and 65 miles today and my ass is aching. Actually, I'm fine sitting on a normal chair.

Personally, I don't think that there is a comfortable hybrid seat because you are sitting up right and moving your legs up and down. It's like two sticks and a flint rubbing together. No wonder my ass is on fire.

Yesterday I rode quit a lot on very fine rocks, some call chat. There was lots of drag on the way back heading into the wind.

Maybe I'll sell both the hybrid and the old road bike and get a nice new road bike. Maybe I'd rather have an aching neck and shoulders (Ibuprofen helps that!) rather than a slow dragging ass. The bike is just too slow.

Yesterday and today each riding 65 miles took me right under six hours on the hybrid. On my road bike I can do 100 miles under eight hours. And my ass didn't hurt but just a little bit. Because on a road bike your weight is more evening distributed and you are more balanced.

Now, sitting her, I'm about to fall asleep. Oh, I forgot I was up at about 4:30 AM.

Now that it is all over with..and I survived. I was going to say, that it wasn't that bad..but it was.
Time to take a shower....then nap.

I'm doing better I'm not eating like a pig when I ride. But, I just ate part of a hamburger. I needed that.

Later..

What a Drag!

I call it the clunker. It's like dragging a ball and chain. It has 26 inch wheels compared to my 27 inch wheel road bike which glides along as I pedal my merry way.

I rode 65 miles with the clunker today! I'm bushed! Tomorrow I'll do it again. Why? Because I want to register for a 65 ride to a little wine town, have fun, then ride 65 back the next day.

I've never ridden 65 miles back to back. The ride will be on very finely rocked old railroad trails. Called the Katy Trail.

The section of trail I rode today was in excellent condition for a finely rocked path. Even with the heavy rains the last few days the trail was in excellent condition. That fine chat gets like concrete after a while. I could have easily rode my road bike.

The ride I am gearing up to is in August. My friend wants me to join her and I'm thrilled. She is taking her hybrid. So I"m taking mine by her suggestion. It's probably best. There will be many people on the trail and conversation will be easier. There will be break points in fifteen miles intervals along the ride on the way out and the next day on the way back.

She and I will share a tent. I don't plan on getting any sleep and that is why I rode today with about two hours, or three of sleep. I didn't plan it that way it just happened I took day time sinus medicine to close to the evening hours.

Anyway, I did fine except I'm beat. It seems like it took forever to ride a mile with that thing. Those little wheels make me have to pedal that much more and I have to be in an easier gear because of the drag. My quads got a workout today. Gee I hope they are cool cut bulging as I walk in my riding pants. Trust me, they feel like they should be..

Tomorrow I'll try to start out a bit earlier to avoid the wind that usually occurs by early afternoon. This morning I planned on starting early but I pulled my car over to talk on the phone just as I left my condo. I was on the phone for probably fifty minutes. So I got a later start. She's adorable and a sweet friend in job turmoil right now.. so I wanted to be there for
her.

Then came the magical moment of the day! Her partner asked. "What is your advice on......"
Can I really recall anyone actually asking for my advice. I didn't think much of it then but after I got off the phone my buttons were popping (well, if I had buttons on my bicycle jersey). It's just a wonderful feeling to have someone value your opinion. Last weekend I helped her with an ad she wanted to place. I bet we spent close to an hour comparing layouts and lines of information and expressing how each caught our attention or made us feel. It was fun! What a magical time. You these two friends are about thirty years younger than myself and it's just fun to share some life taught wisdom and experience with them only when asked. Very important. Besides, are you kidding me, I learn more from them in so many way. I love it. It's really not an age thing.. I think we three just kind of click! Very magical! Our moments together are very magical!

Life is grand. I love where I live. I love having my windows open (I'm above the first floor) and hearing the people and dogs walk below and walk and laugh. I'm in the trees with the birds and I love their songs. At night I heard the tree frogs. Oh how delightful.

I'm so not ready for closed up air conditioning. So, I'll hold off as long as possible. I'm not like a lot of people who think once they turn the air conditioning on they leave it on. Every on has their on thoughts and plans about doing things. Some people think the air conditioning is like the furnace and only runs when it around to desired temperature. But, I have heard air conditioning running in fifty degree temperatures. Why? Because they run to pull the moisture out of the house. Anyway, that's my experience on the subject.

Time to close I want to play my guitar, draw, and read before going to bed. See, I'm waking up. Earlier I was falling asleep as I was drawing a picture so I went and laid down on the bed. Hello! Then I was wide awake! What is it with me and not being able to sleep in the horizontal position? I won't be able to sleep in the tent either. It's okay I have already factored that in..I'll get a little sleep. And I'll order a tail wind for the way home. Oh hell, both ways! Let's see if "The Secret" can pull that one off!" Universe, are you listening? Be with me...make it magical!

The Hydrogen Fuel Cell Cars..

I'm reading "The End of Oil" by Paul Roberts. Written 2004. The book is quite fascinating actually and the chapter on hydrogen fuel cells tell me alot about how it will work. Actually, it needs a fuel like national gas to or manure in the tank . There is an electric wire which separates the electrons from the proton then another wire to rejoin them again.

Chapter three tell you all about the hydrogen fuel cells and how they work. Do you remember before 9 11 and Bush's stat of the union address actually had to consider domestic policies..that was when he mentioned hydrogen fuel cell cars... and I was stunned as so many Americans were watching the address. It was the first time we had ever heard anything about hydrogen fuel cell powered cars. What? Was my reaction.

But, after 9 11 Bush never had to worry much about domestic policies because every other word was trying to get us over there in Iraq to protect "our interest" over there. In other words the "oil".

Or maybe he did refer to hydrogen fuel cell cars again in 2002 (or maybe it was the first time); but never the less, it was suspected that he mentioned it in the 2002 state of the union address to avoid the politically dangerous task of raising fuel efficiency in American cars.

It seems people are actually losing interest in the hydrogen fuel cell idea. My personal opinion? Well, Fords are still catching on fire. And any other American made car are still rated below average by Consumers Reports...check it out!

Why would the American public "risk" leasing or buying a hydrogen fuel cell car made by the American auto industry?

I love this quote at the end of Chapter three by Frank Lynch, a former automotive engineer who now designs hydrogen generators, "I'm afraid that when we finally get people to stop associating hydrogen with bombs and the Hindenburg explosion, the next work they'll think of will be 'scam.'" I love it! It got a chuckle out of me..

Hm! I'm glancing through the rest of the book and do not see a single chapter about using electricity (created by windmills). Remember "Who killed the electric car?" Rent the DVD, you'll love it! A real eye opening. Netflex has it. It's so good I bought the DVD.

Anyway, electricity is here! We won't need special fueling pumps or fueling stations.. on a regular outlet. Hello! California, and only California, because they gripped enough is allowed to sell the $2,000 kit that the owner (or dealer) can convert his existing Prius to become a plug-in. Don't you just love it? And haven't the auto dealers and the government just kept it as quiet as hell. Except for the DVD "Who killed the Electric Car?" I believe they mention it.

I do believe that hydrogen fuel cell powered vehicle will never fly :) It's a scam people from the government to you so you actually think they have clean air, non-oil dependent future plans. But when they did do is built more super sized SUVs like the Ford Excursion that get ( and get a load of this.. of course you'll have too... I mean gas..) which gets a mere 4 (yes I said four) miles per gallon in the city. That would be like driving my condo around town.

Now would be crazy enough to buy one of these buildings? Someone already maxed out on his credit cards? Oh that reminds me, read "Maxed Out" by James D. Scurlock. You love it!

I need to get reading because next I want to read. "The Two-Income Trap" by Elizabeth Warren and Amelia Warren Tyagi. Another good read... I could tell just by reading the first few pages.

Don't you just love this stuff?

The one in the distance dream...

I'm celebrating my ex's (well it been 2 1/2 years since we split) or should I say my friend's birthday tomorrow evening. We have always kept our friendship close. It was very special. But I believe that the time we needed to be together has come to an end.

She's having her long distance girlfriend of over a year move in at the end of the month. My ex shows signs of nervousness when they were together this past weekend with a bunch of friends for a mini vacation. I think she'll be fine.

I have someone in my life too. She and I have special feelings for each other even though we don't call it a relationship. I think you can't be intimate for seven months and not develop those feelings. I miss her right after she leaves. The day after she tells me she misses me already to. We may try to see each other more than once a week..hopefully. Our time together we quality time. It's so good and that's why we miss each other so quickly I think.

I don't know about her but I'm afraid to change things just too much because longing for each other is very good. It's a very good sign that our intimacy is magical and special. Missing each other is so fabulous when we finally do get together. It's magical!

My ex and I remain close friends. I'll take her out for her birthday tomorrow evening. I just can't seen to find the right card. So, I guess I'll add my own message to it. You know sometimes I get choked up thinking that I just won't be able to pick up the phone and call her any time I want. Well another one of her friends is pretty spoiled too have her pretty much to herself. It will be different now with her having a lover around. Oh well. I'm just glad she is happy.

For some reason for the past couple of years since we split I have always tried to keep my lover's away. In other words I never wanted to rub it in my ex's face. I wanted her to find someone first to join her and her friends.

Life is just hard that way. I'm glad she and I remain close friends. I have a lover but I'm not sure I'm ready for a live in partner. I enjoy my freedom just too much. I love having separate sets of friends. They are all precious to me.

I think it's what I asked the universe for and so it is exactly what I got. I wanted someone, a regular lover, who was not totally available to me and it's exactly what I got. The longing is a little sad, the desire great and when we finally get together are moments together are precious.

So why do I long for the tall, long blonde haired beauty. I think since I was a kid, I longed for her to hold me and love me. I still long for her. She, the someone who is so far out of reach. I know who she is, I think of her everyday. The good doctor maybe. Oh why can't I have you in my life....or someone just as wonderfully warm and brilliant as you. There was something in everything about her - so magical! The other day I met a possible substitute. But, always out of reach. Always probably straight. I just wish a beauty such as this would meet me half way some time. You know, show signs of being interested in me too! Flirt with me for god's sake! Give me a sign.

I feel this longer haired blonde who is warm and sweet with pretty breast getting closer to entering my aura. I feel her. I think of her all the time. Is it another kind of longing. Is it longing for something I never got. Is it something I feel out of fear of a relationship. I'm afraid to commit to another, so I long for still another love? Does this blonde mystical woman keep me safe. Or do I know no other kind of love but only distance out-of-reach love? I never really expect anyone to love me only me loving them. Well, it was my life, my lonely life. As a kid growing up, I longed for this wonderful, affectionate, warm, tall, blonde woman to hold me and love me..it never happened. It still hasn't happened; she is always out of reach. Just me wanting her. I need to feel her wanting me. Is it fear of the present?

Well, I guess it is what makes life interesting. All of my life before and after my long term relationship. I have looked for her, longed for her. But never finding her, and if I did from a distance, she was always the one out of reach. Will I ever be able to hold her close to me and just love and adore her. Worship her! Thank the universe for her? Will our sex be just as wonderful or more heavenly then seemingly possible. This is what I want. I want fire works and shooting stars. I want it all! And because I know specify what I want...I expect the universe to deliver very soon. I can't wait!

The Big Picture

I was thinking as I ran this morning about this country's housing and credit situation. How the government allows big business like banking and financial institutions to take advantage of the ignorance and wants of people.

It seems that if anyone of any wage category wants to buy a house these institutions will find a way for you to get it. I was reading in "Maxed Out" by James D Scurlock that a young woman working at Home Depot or Loews or one of them had her sights on a $200,000 home. Anyway, I guess between the realtor and banker suggestions she got her loan. The banker sat there and she and he committed fraud. He suggested she put $6,000 in stead of $1,300 has her monthly wages. I'm sure her interest rate was low at the beginning. I'm sure their was financing too for the down payment. Anyway, the realtor and banker and title company all got their fees at closing. Within six months she defaulted and lost the house.

Of course some blames fall on the buyer here too. I mean where was the extra money going to come from...just fall out of the sky? She should have known that she was being taken for a ride.

Back about twenty years ago and beyond it was tough to get a loan because bank officers didn't want to take a chance on you. Seems that mentality changed with the introduction of the credit card. Suddenly everyone had ready credit.

The credit card changed everything about our economy. Banks learned they could make a bundle on credit card balances. Banks still don't pay their employees anything but the big shots are making a killing.

This is just how the government runs the country too. This administration sees tax payers has nothing more than a monetary resource. They don't want you to get any breaks because they are working for big businesses like health, insurance, oil, auto, banks and more.

We as legitimate (that's another blog entry) tax payers are slaves to big business and Bush. Is it just me are is Bush getting about as arrogant as they come. I think after about seven years he finally caught on to what daddy and cronies are all about...riping people off to benefit the rich oil and banker mongrels.

I believe that this economy is borderline disaster because through advertising and most of all "keeping up with the Jones" people are pushing credit limits,failing and losing everything.

"So and so has a big truck so I gotta get a big truck" is the mentality that will crush your economic state of mind.

We must get back to the basics of life. Simply! Who are you trying to impress anyway? If that is the only way you think she will love you..then forget her. She has no common sense. Daddy probably bought everything for her and still does and now she expects you to take over financing her every whim.

Live within your means! Now that's a novel idea! Hark! Learn to do without! Oh my god, I should die! Learn to put off gratification - another novel idea! I put things off and within a week either I have forgotten about it or decided I really didn't really need it. If I want to treat myself I make it something small. I've learned and it doesn't take much to make me happy. Rather get into yourself, your health, meditate, read, do yogi, a walk in the evening can do you wonders and you'll meet like minded people.

When I was in school I loved, and admired, (but was too insecure myself to try it) the kid who had a "look of their own". They didn't care what the next girl or guy wore. They had their own "artsy" look.

I didn't stand a chance to be an individual around my mother. She was "one of them". She was always worried about "what people would thinkg". (wasn't I more important than "them"?) I grew to hate the woman and now can't stand to be in her presence. The woman was always in pain about something..constantly. I kept waiting for her to die, but year after year, the crabbing and complaining went on... I finally had to move far away. First I tried emotionally separately myself. That didn't work. She was draining the very life out of me. So then I moved physically away, far away. Where do people actually get off thinking that something really wants to fuss all over them all the time. The woman was a total pain in the ass! God, how that woman ruined my life. Talk about manipulating, controlling and shallow. I'm so glad I do not associate with them any more. Thank God!

Oops how did that resurface? Got a little side-tracked there. Anyway, bottom line - beware. I was just thinking that I was so lucky not to have "the credit card" as I was in my early adult life and first getting starting work and living in an apartment trying to save for a down payment. It took that good union job and within a year I had my downpayment to buy my condo.

Well I guess, there were "the credit cards" I just never got one. And finally years later when I did, probably in the 90's I pay everything off every month. I watched my budget and if I couldn't afford it. I didn't buy it. I "saved up" for things. I now the banks weren't making any money off of me..sorry.

Just say "No" to spending. That doesn't give you the green light to use other people and take advantage of someone who is genious. After a while, they'll see right through you anyway. Remember, you never get anything for nothing. Another one: If it (or he or she) looks too good to be true, then your gut is trying to tell you something).

Okay, I have to go down and get the paper now and read so I have more to sprout off about. Have a nice day. Thanks for stopping by.