Saturday, May 13, 2006

I dreamed about you

About 2:30 A.M. and it woke me up. You were a little girl running place to place (like across a stage, with a woman running close, as if trying to crab your hand). Your hair was pulled back, you wore a dark shaded loose fitting mid-calf length dress. Your little hands clutched together. Your eyes looking all worried. You were saying somthing....crying out, worried and tearful.

"Why do I love lose, injured little animals?" You wondered.

The women (care takers?) taking turns to run along side of you; but they couldn't crab ahold of you..and one by one dropped out of the running.

I was at a 45 degree angle...about 40 feet away. I kept calling; it was if you couldn't hear me. You were so distracted by your own thoughts..your own heartache. My heart was aching and I was out of breath - tired. I was on my knees with my arms out-stretched wanted to catch you and hold you and make you feel better, and love you...somehow you never caugh on to that idea. You finally, made a turn after the last woman dropped off and you headed towards me. Right to me you came with your arms out stretched...almost crying.

I gathered you up and felt your pain and held you close to my heart. How wonderful you felt..holding you close. How I love you. How I want to hold you like this forever. I close my eyes and tenderly kiss your hair.

In my heart I know you love the little lost, abandoned, injured animals because this is how you love yourself.

I wrap you in my arms.. and my heart bursting with love. I'm on my knees holding you. You buried you head in my shoulder. You allowed me to love you. I think you even allowed yourself to feel my love for you.

I woke up missing you. My left rib area and the back of my head near my neck (crepe) area hurting...

My heart cannot abandon you....and will not.

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