It's bullshit!

I walked with L, my retiring friend. She is unhappy in her relationship with C who has decided they should sell the house within two years? C said that very same thing a while back? Amazing. Both are unhappy? Even my ex and I agree on that one.....end it! Funny, this relationship for L is just like the previous. I wonder if most relationships are not fulfilling, one-sided, and co-dependent relationship. Personally, I'm glad I'm not in one. Why should I give up my freedom, compromise, when I can have it all my way. I think in any relationship some one always comes up short and sooner or later gets tired of it.

Speaking of my ex, she helped me bring home a new TV and hook it up. She enjoyed drilling holes in back of my cabinet/stand. We are still friends; I'm glad she and I ended it when we could still be.

My ex has a girlfriend in Fl., and keeps very busy. She is happy; so am I. I'm glad she is happy since I busted us up.

I was alone most of the time as a kid..no friends, really. I was shy and not very social. So I had to learn. I found it was just easier to let people have their way..my mother taught me this too. People are happy and love you as long as you take a back seat; but the moment you become secure and begin to be yourself...look out! It's as it they sense it and then they end it. It's just not worth it to me..I am my own best friend and I know it. I will love me more than anyone else and I know this is a fact too. It's just the way it is people. Someone is giving and someone is gladly taking.

I have no idea why I am a loving person and personally I would rather not be..I'd rather be the type who just uses people; they always seems to come out on top.

My best time this weekend was Saturday morning. I love the runners group. Maybe because we are all high on endorphines after a good run, then sweetened with bagels and caffeine.

Don't get my wrong, I'm a very caring person and I do have the capacity to love.. and that is my weakness. There is no such thing as unconditional love!

In case you are wondering; unconditional love is loving someone just for who they are. There are no demands placed. It's just loving someone for who they are. I usually love like that; trust me, I never expect love back or anything from that person; it's usually not there to give.

In all honesty, most people are takers and haven't a clue as to what loving someone truly means.

Personally, I just think life sucks and love is bullshit!