It seems my spirit, my core, my soul needs to be loved and needs to love; to touch, to hold.
To feel the warmth and presence; to hear a heart beat, a sign. To feel a kiss on my cheek, my lips, my breast, my belly.
I get so close to it; the touch. But, then I can't have it. I'm not wanted in that way. It's breaking my aching heart.
I miss the passion, the warmth, the idea of love..because I know passionate love doesn't really exist.
I miss my summer love. And now, this...this dangling before me, out of reach. I'm a human being, I need love, touch and warmth. I have needs and desires. Sometimes it's hard to have it in front of me and then know it's out of reach.
Hey, spirit guides! I think I need some help me....this life is killing me!
First, I have this cold family; then I was kid, grew up at a time, when friends didn't even hug. Kids and women are degraded. I remember, needed a hug so bad, just a hug.
And then I tried to live the straight life...well, I got the sex and the touch then..but I couldn't feel the love, if it was there at all. I couldn't relate to words of love. I was empty inside; it wasn't me talking, it was someone else.
And now, the only love I've know is gone, the one last summer, and my heart is aching for her touch. I never knew love like that before her.
I need to be make love to in the worse way. Right now there are only two people whom I want to love me in this fashion and they are both out of reach.
Is that how my loveless parents screwed me over. I only can relate or not relate to out of reach loves? I am so screwed!
Okay, spirit guides, the challenge is on...I'm asking you to help me out here. I need love and affection and much more, I need to be able to feel it coming to me and I need to experience mutual love. I need your help! Don't let me die without another love..times wasting away. I look good! But, I'm not getting any younger here...
So spirit guides...lend me some help, soon.
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