See, I knew I had a purpose!

Well, I finally got that run in today. I ran four miles to the gym then worked out for about 40 minutes, then ran back home the same way. It felt great! Now I'm going to do some yoga positions; but, first I need to vacuum up dog hair!

I then want to read the book, M gave me. I must remember tomorrow to give her the medal she gave me back. She earned it; I didn't! She needs it back! I hope I don't hurt her feelings but she deserves it not me.

She's very nice! She was just hurting that's all when she gave it to me. She felt bad, I guess that she had so many. I don't know. She thought I should have gotten a medal that there should have been a third place I guess. I felt that way the year I won second place. I felt D's age group should have had another position so she could have won. And she would have won too. Anyway, D was a winner to me! Everyone liked her. At times I miss her; I hope she is doing well! She was wonderful to me and helped me so much in every way when I needed help most last June 2005 and beyond!

Okay, I have things I need to do....first vacuum then yoga. It will be a beautiful evening the air is crystal clear and in the 70's. It will get down into the fifties tonight. It's hard to believe that it is fall already. My birthday Sunday!

Hell, it's only a number. I'm getting younger and more gorgeous everyday. I am and free too; I merely wish for it! According to "What the Bleep do we know" and J Z Knight, we are all gods. The power lies within each and every one of us to be able to create our days. Hey, I got sex didn't I!

Now, I will be getting my 30's back. You see, I missed out of my 30's because of ignorant society, church, family and the stupid government who uses homosexuals as mere distractions from the "real" issues. The media does their bidding and makes a mockery of us. We are created without fault or failure. We are the universe's creatures. Actually, we are spiritual being who have come to earth to learn (and personally, I think for sex). Anyway!

I think I got the message! And the message is forget organized religion they only want you to break the rules so they can "fix" you for a fee. Everything on earth has a price you know!

But here's is what I'm finding and that is that there are so many ignorant spirits on earth. I guess they are ignorant or evil. Well, they are men, so what do you expect! Men are always in pursuit to conquer someone or something. It's a dog eat dog man's world out there.

Do you see women starting wars over stupid shit, like he hit me or took my soldiers. It's all stupid bullshit and Ford has never learned how to make a decence vehicle. There, now you know how I really feel. Yes, the Ford motor company lives in the past! Who thinks of this dumb shit? And why so godly huge? Why are they such gas guzzlers. Oh I know, Ford is in cahoots with the oil companies. I guess Ford is in cahoots with the insurance companies too because they paint their windows black so you can't see through them and the vehicles are so dumb ass big that you can't see around them to back out of a parking spot...so you get in a accident and the insurance company raises your premiums.

So, auto, oil and insurance are ripping us off. Oh and so is big business because they are shipping all the good paying jobs overseas for the people in India to do. And you know everything is made in China for years now at next to no cost to big corporations so the big shot CEOs can compete with each other and see who can make the most billions of dollars.

Gee, just how much do you need before you get sick of it. Oh those little dick old white boys with white hair and blue dick tips will never get too much money. It's like Viagra for the brain! Boy, the pharmaceutical companies were thinking when they came up with that one and insurance pays for it too. Did you know most insurance companies; however, do not pay for birth controls pills. Yeah, let's screw the women in more ways from Sunday, then we can think of. Let's keep them in their place. Let's bully them and pay them less of a salary for the same job done the same way, and even better then their male counterparts.

Let's make all the school administrators little dick, dumb head, short white men who are clueless. Yeah let's give them all the good jobs. Hell, women don't need a good job, they are not heads of households! Oh yes they are! But whose counting - certainly not the little dicks.

Oh hell, let's start a war for oil. Well, how are we going to get the war started. Oh, I know. let's blow up a big building or two and kill about three thousand people. How we gonna do that asked the dumb shit from Texas. Oh, I know. We have all kinds of deals with the Saudis they'll do it for us. Okay! And then we'll blame it on Saddam Hussein and go after him. So what if daddy Bush supplies him with nuclear weapons in the 80's so he could go after Iran.

We want control of the oil fields so what if there is collateral damage! It's for the almighty buck. We have to get the most profit from the Middle East oil fields that we can and we have to keep control of them. Gee, we sure don't hear much about the Saudis lately do we as they buy up half this country. The Japanese already own much of Hawaii.

I predict China would love to come over here and buy up land and buildings. They are running out of land and have limits on how many children they can have. Here they can have has many children as they like. Bush needs the tax base for war and debts we already owe to China and Japan. They have bailed us out so many times. Oh enough of these idiots why waste my time and mind thinking about how evil they all are. It's all about greed! Can't we just love one another? Love! Let's see that reminds me..

Hopefully, M is still planning on coming to see me tomorrow. I sure hope so. Sometimes, I can't breath when I think of us; how wonderful it was and how wonderful it will be. It had been a very long time for both of us. For her longer, I think! The universe put us together at that biathlon. The first thing I requested after the universe helped me ride my bicycle over the finish line with a flat I was riding on for the last ten miles was - sex. I want sex now I begged. I was going nuts!

I talked to her then and in the course of the conversation she indicated her similar state of lack of affairs you could say! I thought about it over night and called her at work the next day..she came over that afternoon! It was wonderful! She said heaven sent me! See, I knew I had a purpose! I HAVE A PURPOSE!

See, I do have a purpose! Anyone else need me? A, how about you. You are as sweet and cute and precious to me as can be. I can't wait to see you tomorrow evening. If you need me, please let me know.

And how about T? Is she doing well? Or does she need me too? I think of her often and hope she is happy and loved. I'm sure she is. It just seemed she and I cliched. I think of her often, if thinking and dreaming and wishing are prayers then she is doing okay without me - damn! But understandable! There was just something in everything about her. I just loved her so! Maybe I'll watch the video again.. I'm not telling you what video! You don't need to know. Let's just put it this way. Anyone can watch it!

You know that was another magical moment in my life and the universe practically spoke to me directly that evening. I had recorded her in a medical show but I inadvertently erased it. For a very long moment I was very upset. But, the intuitively I knew I would catch a better episode with her in it all the more. And you know what? As I was thinking this. I saw another recorded show come on and heard her voice. And in a moment I saw her! My heart jumped. She was featured as the main person throughout the whole show. She was fabulous and had an all woman team. God love her! What a wonderful thing. I have it recorded video's and it came on again since I moved here. So I have it again if I need a fix.

Yes, the universe works with us. Or do we create our realities. Did I put her in my life? Did I put D, A, and now M in my life because I needed them there? I believe that I did! I do believe it's a mutual need. So, I don't think that I have seen the last of T yet either.

I love this stuff! I love creating my day and watching it unfold and as it does, looking for magical moments to convince me that I can truly plan my day; that I have the power! The power lies within people! Think it and be it! You must believe in yourself and never give up that belief. I am becoming younger looking all the time. Why, well as Clinton once said. "Because I can!" when asked why he had relations with that woman! Oh, that was after he came clean about the lie! It's natural for a man to lie the first time you ask them something about cheating..