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I"m back home now after visiting friends watching "Night is Falling". A movie about two women meeting and falling in love. Excellent! Nice love scenes. And it end happily!

Dinner was delicious and plentiful. After the movie we played games. I came out the loser but had fun.

They are a wonderful group of women.

In all honesty! Sometimes it's a little hard to see loving couples embracing with warm affection. We were not a real warm fuzzy couple.

And last year I held back not to embarrass or make anyone feel uncomfortable.

I remember one evening I was to meet her at an outside coffee house. I truly loved 05SL and couldn't wait to see her. I kissed her head. My heart missed her. She never really returned those feelings. That's okay. We all love the best we can.

I loved the feeling of loving and wanting her. It was wonderful!

I have hopes for the future and pray everyday for love to come my way. I want to be in love. I want her to be adorable. I need her to love me! It won't work unless she loves me and wants me.

I know it's a lot to ask. A big bill for a tender loving heart to fit. I knows she is out there. I need just a little help from the universe and the love spirits and mine and her spirit.

I want to be in love! I need to expect her to love me; otherwise, it's not going to work.

I think life is amazing! And I think that I am in love with the unobtainable impossible again. What the hell is wrong with me? Hey! I just want sweet and adorable; kind and wonderful. And that is her!

Good Night!

I'm meeting my friend in the morning to walk with her and I hope I am in better spirits. Well, if I get to bed soon and get up extra early so I can run first. I'll feel much better.

Later, toward evening it's golf. God, please help me out here. I feel that I am beginning to slip back into unhappy patterns of life. Please help me? I can't regress, only progress. Please help!