My Perfect Love!

I so love the things that I do: Guitar and dance lessons, running, yoga, blogging. I need to begin writing my memoirs too in practice for my writing classes coming up. I am able to concentrate and focus with ease. I had an awakening the other evening when a woman in my spirituality class said she spoke to a channeled spirit and asked why she never got along with her mother. The spirit told her that she picked her mother in order to learn to love yourself.

Now I have to tell you that I have thought about this very thing about two days before the woman said this. I have often thought the ache and longing in my heart was maybe meant for me to connect with myself not to reconnect with a lost lover. Well, I still miss the lost lover and think, and pray for her, but no longer with the same intensity; now I realize they are two separate issues.

Since I have come to the conclusion that the ache in my heart was for me and not another - I no longer have the ache. It's gone! I have finally made the connection and making that connection frees me up to love another. I love myself immensely; therefore, I will love another has much as I love myself.

I still think of my summer loves of 04 and the one of 05; nothing has changed with them. They were both angel spirits and gifts from the universe. My spirit guides put them in place for me when I needed them most! They were perfect wonderful being for me when I needed them most. And hopefully, I did some good, in some way, for them too! Gee, makes me wonder who will be next.

Because I do long for the touch of human flesh on mine and the warmth of a loving heart, I desire a particular type of relationship; more of a secret type of relationship where we come together to love and comfort each other alone. We are there for each other to listen and celebrate our love. The relationship is not difficult; but rather convenient and suited for both independent lifestyles. We won't tell friends; and somehow I don't think that would be hard to do. She will live close, very close physically. We will begin as friends and then it suddenly will develop into something very special. In my heart and mind that is all love needs to be! Our relationship will be perfect for her busy career and my free spirit.

This type of love arrangement would be perfect for me. I have a lot of love in my heart to give but I'm independent and like being independent. I want my own space and once more need my own space. She is the same way!

Our relationship will be filled with loving affection, conversation, romantic dinners, and love making. We will cherish the time alone just the two of us. We won't be together every night maybe once or twice a week. We will be free to do what we each like to do. Oh, sometimes we will do things together, but most of the time now; because she is very busy. I will do a lot of things with friends rather than her; and she maybe the same. We will have an understanding, respected and loving relationship.

What? You think we wouldn't be able to stay away from each other? You know the saying: Absence makes the heart grow fonder! I so love that visual for when we do get together; and, to me, that is how love should be!

Now, I am going to concerntrate on this dream and wish it true! What me! I wanted to see Teresa one day and five minutes later I did! My heart was aching and I just wanted to see her; that was all that I wanted - a sighting. I wished it and it happened. Timing, place and dreaming and want it makes things happen according to the spirit world. We are all more powerful than what we think!

I was running near her neighborhood; something told me to turn around here and now, so I did. Three blocks later, I got to the corner in time to see her waiting for traffic to past in order to make a left turn. I just happened to have a "walk" light in her direction that would take me right next to her as she turns in front of me. I see her window is down. I see her lovely hairand deep brown eyes as she sees me standing there. My heart melts! I smile! She smiles! She looks me up and down and recognizes me, in my heart I know she does. She smiles and goes on knowing who I am. She remembers! It had been over a year since I was in her arms. We reconnected if only for a moment! I run the rest of the way home without my feet touching the pavement! Yes, our spirit guides were with me. It was a gift! We saw that we were each well and good! It was all that I wanted and needed. Maybe she too, because I think she thought of me as the one she couldn't help. I was very troubled that year and she comforted me. She had sensed my troubled heart and wrapped her arms around me; no one had every meant more or connected more. I needed what she did very badly that day; I think she saved my life! Our hearts hurt that day!

So, I do know that wonderous moments and although short in time special relationship do take place. We meet the people we meet for a reason. I love certain people for a reason. Once more when I love, it's life long; although not acted upon for various reasons; but still,on my mind and in my heart.

I'm in a good place mentally, emotionally and spiritually; I know another love is about to happen and soon. And once more, I think it will be just like the love I desire and described above; for I am in control. Watch me! It will just happen, because I'm in a good place and I am a loving person. I would be good for someone who is lonely yet has no time or desire for any complicated relationship. We will be perfect for each other; only seeing each other maybe a couple times a week but keeping it very special. Just the two of us! Remember the play made into a movie with Allan Alda "Same Time Next Year." Well, unlike the movie, we won't be cheating on partners. I don't have the heart for that; unless she is in a very bad relationship. No matter; that is not the point, the point being we will have a very special loving relationship.

But, we will both have our own lives and our relationship will be icing on the cake! Actually, I would rather not have our relationship be hurtful to someone else; that is not a good thing. I want my lover to be relationship free when we get together, the same as I will be!

I will dream it into reality. She'll be wonderful, loving and giving also. It will happen because I am a loving giving person and would be good for someone. We would be good for each other. Ours will be a mutual admirable loving relationship filled with wonderful love, freedom and understanding.

Me holding her in my arms and kissing her forehead listening to her tell me about her day. I loving her very much want to hear everything and want so to know her heart, her dreams, her disappointments and her concerns. Then the love making comes. This I will not share with you it's private, very special and private!